So today I thought I’d write about something I struggled with in a few different ways. First of all, because I’m not high class or need expensive things I didn’t believe I tried to be perfect in any way. Haha. The joke was on me. Little did I know that it means something else completely and I had a severe case of it. I could go into all the things I’ve read about perfectionism, but I’m going to explain what it feels like to me, a former addict and nobody(which is how I thought of myself), but really from an average everyday person. It kind of goes along with being the person everyone else thinks we should be or the person we’ve always thought we should become based on things we saw growing up or just general expectations. I found out the hard way that even when I was using I was living my life in other people’s expectations of myself or what I perceived them to be at least. It’s a tough pill to swallow and very hard to look at all the different things we do just because we think that’s how it has to be. It’s taken me a long time to realize that this is one of the reasons I was so miserable for so long. I’m finally at a point where I still don’t have much figured out, but I do know that I’m choosing to live by my standards from now on, which may greatly differ from everyone else’s. We are each so unique in our own ways and life experiences that there is plenty of room to live life in a way that brings you JOY, EASE, HAPPINESS, and SO much LESS STRESS. Why haven’t we all realized this a long time ago? Why do we live the way some of us do? That I have no answer for, but I do know the more I realize we do have a choice, the more I want to make choices that make me feel fulfilled and happy and peaceful. Perfectionism to me is that factor that we say “when I have ____ money, I’ll be happy”, “when I meet my soulmate I’ll be happy”, “when I have a beautiful home anywhere in the world I want to live I’ll be happy”, etc. It’s always thinking we need to do more, be more, and have more to be happy. When we realize we can happy whenever we want with exactly the things we have now, life becomes a lot more relaxed and enjoyable. I’m finally starting to look forward to finding the things that make my heart happy and do a whole lot more of that stuff instead of worrying about what I have or have not accomplished yet.
Action To Take Today
You can start to work on this right now if you’re anything like me and are just stressed out and tired of never feeling truly happy. Take a look at your life and find all the good things. Everything that makes you smile, laugh, or get that tickle in your belly. Be grateful and thank God/Universe for everything you have. Then tomorrow, watch for more of those things or new things that give you a good feeling. Thank God/Universe each day for these things and keep finding things every day. When you focus on the positive things in your life, it brings more positive things. This I promise you. It can be an amazing life for each and every one of us if we want it that way.
Resilience & Recovery 